The Mysteries of October

This has been the weirdest month.

First, the snow. Not even sleet, but real tree-padding snow. I'm out there at 6am, trying to leave for work, still wearing my spring jacket, desperately searching for an ice scraper, but at the same time distracted from my swearing and car-scraping task by the breathtaking, sparkling, otherworldliness of the first snowfall. And this year it turned out to be even more otherworldy because of the leaves still on trees, making it appear as if we lived in a world of giant cauliflower. For awhile, I felt awfully happy to live in Minnesota.

Then, Dave and I close on our house this Thursday. Which is also weird, because just a little over 2 months ago Dave didn't even have a job and a little black cloud constantly hovered over our heads. So how WEIRD it is that all of a sudden now we're going to have a house? How did that happen? It has a "poof!" wish fulfillment quality to it, even though clearly we put in a lot of work to make this happen.

Also weird: being a student again. The reading, the group work, the awkward ice breakers and small talk during breaks, the research papers, the funny little cliques and battling egos. It's pulling me back to the late 90s-early 00s when I was last a graduate student, feeling those insecurities and ambitions once more. But this time it's more complicated because I'm used to being in charge of the classroom now, and it's hard for me to not jump in and take the lead. After the first day I thankfully realized that I needed to tone down the Hermione Granger stuff, and allowed myself to be appropriately passive...which in the end made things nicer for all, myself included. But it only adds to the mysteriousness of this October...me sitting there in class thinking "what am I doing sitting here in a class?" as if just waking up from a fitful dream.

Hope your October is full of happy and mysterious surprises as well!